The Formula for Awful Cold Emails

Received this gem in my email inbox the other day:

~

Hi William,

I'm NAME from BUSINESS. We hope to work more with organisations like yours. Do you have time in the coming weeks for a quick call?

~

Oh, the many answers I have to this simple message...

No, I don't have time for calls. No one does.

I make time for them, but only when they're worthy of it. Because there's always a cost.

Even the time and mental energy spent planning a call (especially given how hard it is to find a time, given my timezone... ) isn't nothing.

Folk who act like my time is worthless not only insult me, they reveal how worthless they think their time is...

Now, yes, I could make time for a call.

But why would I do that?

I'm not being snarky. Seriously, why? I don't even email my wife - let alone strangers - asking for a call without giving them a reason...

Also, and this is just a guess (because, hey, there's no context) but I suspect this individual wants to sell me marketing services.

Now, it's not unheard of for a marketer to hire a marketer for a job. Happens every day. But, again, without any context, I assume they haven't done their homework. They think I'm somehow deprived of marketing, I guess?

Anyway, there's zero reason for me to engage with a request like this.

Short of dissecting it with cruelty and precision, obviously.

But it's easy to criticise. What would have piqued my curiosity?

Well, I've responded to cold contacts in the past. It's even led to business arrangements more than once.

They tend to do something like this:

First, they offer me something I want.

Then they make me want it.

Then...

No, that's about it.

So what do I want?

Maybe I want to earn more clients, make more money or deal with the mould growing in my shower.

(If you don't know what I want, good luck selling to me.)

So a better message might read:

~

Hi William,

I'm NAME from BUSINESS. I know attracting clients as a freelancer can be tough. That's why I created a platform that connects freelancers with eager, qualified clients, looking for people like you.

(In fact, I have three coaching clients in mind who seem like they'll be a good fit.)

It won't cost you anything - all you need to do is set up a profile here:

link

Got any questions, blah blah blah

~

Is that a good cold email?

Eh, it could use some work. It doesn't paint the scene strongly enough and it doesn't use enough emotion.

But if I received this, I'd at least check it out.

This stuff isn't rocket science but, wow, are entrepreneurs managing to lowball this bar.


Oh well. It's not like anyone teaches you this stuff.

Wait a minute... I do.

Want to learn email marketing, content marketing and a few other things, at no cost and in about an hour? You should consider using my affiliate link for 2 months of free access to all the training you can handle.

https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Formula-for-Awful-Cold-Emails&id=10155396